Last month I had a 3 hour drive Up North to Land O’ Lakes in Wisconsin to visit my daughter who is away at a boarding school. There wasn’t very good radio reception up there and being that it was a spur-of-the-moment trip in a borrowed car meant that I didn’t have any entertainment with me outside of my own thoughts.
The thing I thought about most was change.
I feel like the winds of change are getting ready to blow again in my life. It’s pretty hard to “put your finger” on the wind and see what might be coming or going but there have been events that lead me to believe something is stirring in the branches of my life.
The last time I felt this feeling was about 6 years ago and within 4 short months my two best friends moved out-of-state (Tracy was one of them), we stopped being active in our home schooling group, and my children started doing community theater. There were big changes in my marriage too.
Of course I’ve been working to bring about personal changes in my life for a couple of years now. Everybody has a different relationship with change. Some can’t stand the sight of it, others embrace it every time it shows up. Change is something I’ve been looking for. But if we love it or hate it, it comes just the same.
What was really surprising was that when I arrived at my daughter’s school and we sat down to talk, she started the conversation with saying, “Mom, I feel like things are going to change. Not anything bad, it’s just that everything has felt the same for so long, and now I think somehow it’s not going to be the same anymore.”
I’m sure my eyes must have been getting bigger and bigger as she spoke.
Being away at school for the first time, I wasn’t surprised that she had that feeling but I couldn’t let go of the surprising coincidence of her bringing it up.
What is it that makes me feel that change is coming? The following are just a few of the things that make me believe I’m starting to feel the winds of change:
There are several things ending right now for me. If they aren’t ending soon, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, most endings mean that a beginning is somewhere nearby. Endings and beginnings by nature, involve change.
One of the things ending for me is home schooling. It’s something I’ve done for SO LONG and now I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. My daughter will be applying to colleges when she gets home. My middle son has only one year left with me. My youngest is considering going to high school, which he is free to do. Home schooling isn’t ending tomorrow but there is a big shift happening.
Are there any endings in your life, now or in the near future?
Is there anything you need, or are ready, to end?
Turmoil always signifies change. As I get older and (hopefully) wiser, I’ve noticed that very often turmoil is created by individuals who really need a change to take place but just don’t know how to make their needs known without creating turmoil first. The turmoil gives them the excuse to make the changes they need.
My home school group is experiencing just such turmoil right now. I have been able to remain mostly uninvolved. Many of my friends are very involved and it’s forcing them to make choices and changes.
Is there turmoil in your life? Is it helping you make some changes? Are you able to make change without turmoil?
Finding answers to long sought questions usually means change is occurring. I’ve had just such an experience with my sinus issues. I’ve been struggling with this problem for a long time and it seems as if real help is finally going to happen. This isn’t the only health issue that I’ve discovered an answer to recently. The constant antibiotics have caused some serious digestive issues and I’ve found some help with that as well.
Is this a magic wand and everything is perfect? No, but it’s more than one step in the right direction of wellness. My fingers are crossed for more positive changes in this area.
I’ve had two, completely unrelated events that felt like circles coming to completion.
1. This summer I spent a great deal of time with family. It was both wonderful and surreal as I don’t spend much time with them. We have all lived very far away from each other for a very long time. I learned things about myself and my relationship with them. It’s as if I never really understood my place within my family until this summer, and it’s a huge feeling of peace to have found this understanding. It felt like a huge gap was shut.
2. The upheaval and turmoil within our home schooling group meant a change in the leadership. My good friend ended up the leader and asked if I would help her lead the group with one other woman. I said I would out of love for her. The weird thing is that I started this home schooling group with Tracy and one other mom. I never imagined when I left leading it all those years ago that I would end up doing it again. Yet, here I am…full circle.
These are just a few of the rustlings in my life that make me think change is coming, or is this the change I’ve been seeking all along, building up its momentum and pushing forward into my reality finally?
How about you? Have any of you ever felt those winds of change blowing?
Here are a couple of great posts on change that I’ve read this month.
Tara of taramohr.com wrote a beautiful post on how to change a belief. She has a wonderful little worksheet on how to change a belief at the end of the post that you can download. What one belief can you change right now? Me? Just this week I’ve realized that I feel helpless in the face of all the sugar laden foods that are everywhere during the holidays. I didn’t know that I felt that until I really took some quiet time and looked at it.
leaf circle image credit: Rawich
falling leaves and leaf photo credit: Kel Wilson
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