Last week we talked about next-level self care. I hope you’ve spent at least a few moments considering what that would be for you.
Today, I want to talk about the biggest reason women don’t commit to taking care of themselves at a higher level.
I believe that reason is guilt.
There are as many different kinds of guilt as there are kinds of women feeling it. On Facebook and Twitter, I recently shared an article, When Me Time Makes You Feel Guilty, written by Kasey Edwards. In the comments on our Facebook page, Carol said, “it comes in very many forms – including not wanting to spend money on or the little extras in time and money to make something pretty rather than just utilitarian.
Yes, that. For me, every time I think I’m done dealing with it, it mutates and crops up somewhere else. That’s why I’m still thinking about it. And I’ve boiled my thoughts on guilt about self care to two things:
- Brené Brown offers a great definition of guilt: “guilt = I did something bad.”
- Since when is taking care of yourself something wrong? A crime?
I am entirely serious. I don’t think self care is a crime, so what’s up with the guilt about it?
I suspect the guilt is actually a message, pointing you toward the thing you need and testing you to see if you’ll make it happen. Did you really mean it, when you said you were going to take care of yourself? Did you mean it enough to push through guilt?
So, whatever your next level of self care is…are you willing to do what you said you needed, even if you’re feeling guilty about it?
I’d love to know your thoughts. Still figuring out what your next level of self care is? Did you notice guilt creeping back in somewhere? Completely disagree with me? Let’s talk it over in the comments!
Say Good-Bye to Guilt by Lynn Larkin MSW, ACSW
- Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead
- The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
- I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t): Making the Journey from “What Will People Think?” to “I Am Enough”
image credit: Markuso